Tuesday, September 23, 2008

One Step at a Time

This week has never been happier for me. Though we’re still in a middle of it, I just wish it will end well. It feels fun yet weird recalling everything that happened since the first day of med school up to present with my friends. Today, I even got the chance to talk to some my friends that once were classmates of mine and now trying to survive the second semester of junior year. I wonder if this is a sign or not?

Most of the time we were laughing at my “pagkaantipatiko” and recalling how we turn uncomfortable events to a laughing matter. Though med life is taking its toll on us we make sure at least we enjoy each other’s company. Now I realized how much I value my friends here. Some may be ahead but will still make sure and search for you and have a nice conversation. There were the ones who remain and make you feel like a part of their family. Some will look up to you and in return you are proud of them too. Some shares their deepest secrets and at the end of the day you’ll realize how it meant to you that they trusted you.

One time I laughed at one situation, a friend was asking for some advice cause she got a not-so-low mark in one exam, and I said, “oks pa yan, kaya pa yan! Mababawi mo pa. konting puyat pa” and right after that I told her that I’m nervous causewill the average for my shifting exams in the same subject will be a trouble for me. And she repeated the same advice I gave her! hehehe

One jokingly told me “wow! Pumayat ka!” and she immediately said… “ako naman, sabihan mo rin ako na payat!” hehe.

But seriously…

Few of my friends knew that I had the plan of taking leave of absence. Maybe some of you will be in shock now. But that plan was unsuccessful. Why? Well first, I have no exact reason why and what to tell the administration why I wanted to leave for a while, if the issue of soul searching is valid, why not? But I bet it won’t. Secondly the semester is almost over. 2 weeks to be exact. Third, I have nowhere to go.

It’s good to hear that your friends are supporting you and there with you no matter what. Though we may have been separated due to some instances, it’s nice to know that for a while they shared a piece of them with me. And for those 3 short years we know each other here that made me feel vindicated and accepted.

For this post I want to thank them for being supportive and understanding and just letting me know and making me feel I belong is a blessing for me. I also want to thank them for keeping my spirits high in times like this. For the fact that I may not be with them most of the time and comforting them, they still manage to stay. Thank you.

So I have to face what I’ve got to face right now. Just keep on moving and believing. It’s hard to explain to you how and why and tell every intricate detail. But I can tell you what I feel, it feels like I’m in the middle of an old and rickety wooden bridge and some force is pushing me to take an immediate step. One wrong move and for sure it will take me to my downfall.



superboi said...

"if the issue of soul searching is valid, why not? But I bet it won’t."

----> hmm, i think it is valid. people do need time for themselves din. they might find it weird siguro, but then again, maybe not. sino ba naman ang ibang tao para kwestyunin ung paghahanap sa sarili eh i bet pansit sila din naman ganon din.

sa akin kasi umeffect yan rason na yan... pero nasa ibang sitwasyon naman kasi ako.

siguro you feel burn out sa mga bagay. just take some time off kahit sa gabi para lang makahinga ang isip mo at lahat na. good thing you have friends who support you all the way.


ponCHONG said...

isama mo na rin ang bakasyon sa yoville.

see you after five days...for sure after five days, alive and kicking ka na naman ulit.

Curbside Puppet said...

extreme emo mode ah. enjoy the sembreak and the weekend na muna. kasi masyadong matagal ang 5 months for LoA.

White said...

Mentos? Hehe

Ipagpatuloy lang. Kaya yan. Promise. :)


Im glad that you really know how to prioritize stuffs.. If Im only like that, then maybe Im in a much better situation.

oh well...

beero said...

ced, i've read your previous that are somehow related to this. i could definitely sense that something is bothering you, my friend.

"if the issue of soul searching is valid, why not? But I bet it won’t." --> lost soul? but this can be valid. kasi minsan kelangan nating mag-reflect, kung san tayo mas masaya at kung ano mas nararapat sa tin. hang on, dude!

Anonymous said...

doc ced, kaya pala hindi ka nagpaparamdam. cge magsoulsearch ka na muna dyan. hanapin ang kaluluwang ligaw.

mahirap magsalita kasi wala kami sa kalagayan mo, pero whatever you choose, in the end ikaw pa rin naman ang sisisihin o papalakpakan kung tama o mali ang naging desisyon mo :)

we're all here waiting.

ang iyong kaibigan,

.::. Vanny .:. said...

ayun naman. nagso-soul searching pala ang worth one million bucks man.. ^^__^^

anyway.. ingat na alng po lagi.. ;)

yeye said...

palibre aman kuya ng mcdo hehehehe

hiatus. ??? malapit na kasi magfinals hahaha. kuya pasalubong ha pagbalik mo hehehehe.

nakapasa ako sa pre-final exam sa pharma hahaha! yahu. wala lang

egeh un lang. ingatz lagi kuya

David Edward said...

ayan since hiatus ka na, pa burger ka naman!!! hahaha..

on a serious note, i feel sincerity the way you say thank you to your friends. hirap ng nagpapaalam no?

whatever your decisions are, be proud of it. kasi pinag isipan mo yan and im sure of that. if you need to take a break, take a break.

just do the things that will make you happy and satisfied in this life, always remember that life is short. we must take the most out of it.

enjoy life and PRAY!


Rio said...

dok ced, balik ka kaagad ha...

lunes said...

hmm..doc ced. hayaan mo balang araw sasaya ka rin. at yayaman ka.weheh. tlagang ginawang motivation ang pagyaman eh.wehehe.

naku, hiatus ka uli?? basta antayin namin pagbalik mo.

acey said...

wishing you the best, bro!!! :D

Camille said...

naku.. nagiging madrama yta ang blog mo ah.. kumusta ang med week?? ndi mo ba naenjoy? naku ako nga mshado nagenjoy sana naman di ako balikan nitong ssunod na week! God bless! kaya yan!

icka said...

akala ko ako lang ang nageemo, oh well even if you took the wrong step and fall, for sure your friends are there to catch you, include me ced.