For the past year I lost my self-confidence and sense of trust. That trust to myself that I can make difference, that all of the sacrifices and failures that I endure will soon be fruitful. I also lost that drive. It’s true that Medicine is not for the weak at heart. Most of the time, you will lose track of what’s happening outside, with your family, with your friends, even what’s happening in your country. But I guess it’s normal to ask yourself, if what you’re doing is still really what you want. And sometimes, with the help of someone, you will find the answer to that question. That still, Yes, I want to become a Physician.
I remember when I was a kid and almost half of the class would say they want to become a doctor when they grow up. Then when I stepped in high school, the number of aspiring doctors declined. Practically speaking, what would we get after spending at least four years of studying again after college then earning little after? Specialization and subspecialties will take you forever and medicine is a continuous learning process, meaning, old theories can be debunked and new approved theories should be applied.
I never felt special until yesterday and realize that I am one of the few that was given a privilege to study Medicine. Well, all who study medicine is privileged, no matter where you study; no matter if you failed a subject or two, it felt special that this opportunity was given.
I’m not showing off this to all. It’s just a wake-up call for me and I really need to look forward into something. As what they say, “the more things that is given to someone, the more we expect him to give in return”. Meaning, a Physician is placed in a pedestal wherein people look up into him and we expect more from him.
To those who continuously visits my blog. Big thanks for you! And I want to apologize if I forgot to ask how you’ve been, especially my blogger friends. I was in the verge again of closing the blog but I really needed this as an outlet.