Reflections…

these are random things that ran through my head the past few days. prolly encountered some after school, while on the way from gym, while having my coffee fix or just struck my head out of nowhere. :D

Trust…

It’s not what you’re thinking naughty you.

For me it’s the hardest thing to earn from someone. It’s easy to say that “you can trust me” or “I won’t say anything” but in the long run, there will come a time you’ll regret when you gave it easily to someone. Good thing there are still few people that you can trust. I thank those few people.

Regrets…

We all have one or two, maybe more… what’s important is that you reflect and try not to make the same mistakes again.

Respect…

Sometimes what really ruins your day are disrespectful people especially those who have nothing left to do cause’ they’re bored with their lame lives. Seriously, wag nating panungahan ang ibang tao, wag nating basagin ang trip nila, wag natin silang pagchismisan. Respeto… don’t be such an insolent know-it-all about other people, di mo sila kakilala. You might’ve met them, you might’ve seen them, you might’ve rub elbows with them, you might have read some things about them and you might’ve breathed the same air. But that doesn’t mean you know them. So respect.

Acceptance…

Accept the fact that not everyone will like you, that life’s a bitch that way. Be yourself and hold your own, people will not always like you anyway. Accept that there are some instances; life will make it hard for you so you can cope up. Accept that there are good people despite of what you’ve done are still there for you and believing you.

Forgive…

At the end of the day learn to forgive. It might not be easy depending on the magnitude of the situation, but doesn’t it feel good when you actually do so? It gives you clarity and peace of mind.

Faith…

Believe and trust Him.

Believe and trust yourself. You’re capable of doing things when you believe (parang kanta lang).

Love…

Happy that there’s someone that will accept you and love you no matter what size you fit in.

Oooppss Moments

It’s true that one of the best teachers and way to learn is by our daily experiences. Some of us learn from the hard way, it might be by failing a subject, getting your heart broken or some problems we face daily.

But some experiences are learned in funny or sometimes in uncanny ways. Sometimes you’ll go through these experiences and right after you’ll laugh at yourself or sometimes with a company, maybe a family or a friend.

Awhile ago, on my way to Gold’s gym, I took a bus in SM North. I didn’t even read the sign knowing that all buses will pass by the said gym. As I was about to pay, the kundoktor and he told me, “Iho, hindi kami nagsasakay at nagbaba dito” as he returned my 2 five Peso coins. Then I stood up, and when the driver saw me, he scolded me that they’re not allowed to drop someone there and I should’ve read the sign and it goes on and on and on and on. I shouted I’m sorry po! Then I jumped from the bus as he slowed down. For awhile I was worried he will not allow me to get out of that bus. :D

Second experience is that I never figured out yet how to operate the shower in the said gym to switch into cold shower! Lol! I couldn’t ask someone on how to turn it, that would be weird right? Haha. Seriously I was twisting and turning the knob then last week, there! Alas! Hahaha. I was laughing at myself the whole time.

So how about you, any funny experiences? Share ka naman! :D

X's pahabaol, my cousins one time surprisingly visited our house in Cavite. and i was taking a shower then. as we all are rockstars in the shower. i sang Rock with you. and heard them clapping outside. hahaha! that will never happen again. :P

Excited but Frightened...

I finally had it! After I emptied a bottle of cough syrup for the last week, I needed a physician’s advice and some antibiotics that will surely work. I visited a local clinic here in Cavite. Hehe! I’m kind of ok now. Anyway, that’s not what I’m posting today.

There were times before that I will think of someday, me and my siblings will move away from home. We will have our own jobs and will try to make a living. That there will come a time that we’ll have our own family; That we will visit home every weekend and have a small get together; That we will have our own traditions and changes that we will embrace.

I realized that what I was thinking then is fast approaching. Little changes that when I come to think of it is a piece of a puzzle of the future I though.

I am happy that these changes bring a huge amount of excitement to my family.

But at the same time, I’m a bit afraid that this change will take something in return.

I’ll make this short and sweet.

I will soon welcome a niece!

Sunday is Family Day

After a week of staying inside the house and after cleaning my room, I treated myself with some touring. Not out of town though. Since it was my uncle’s birthday, my mom’s side of family decided to have a get together, the original plan was an overnight swimming but due to the unpredictable weather, we had our lunch in my Lola’s house. Remember my baby pic with her? My brother and I were not really decided if we will come, I openly tell you, we are not in good terms with that side of family. But since it’s for our Lola, we decided to go and pay a visit.

When we arrive there, you can feel the pressure. Actually my brother is the one who has real issues with them, bias of me and for sure if you are in my shoes, you will feel the same. After some hypocritical picture taking, fake smiles and maybe some fake chewing, my brother and I thought of coming with our dad to visit the farm.

Riding our owner type jeepney really brings back some memory to me. Nostalgic of my childhood when we were test driving it then after a year or so my parents accidentally forgot me in a store because they thought I was at the back of the jeepney. Going back to the farm does the same for me. I remember falling from a “pilapil” and half of my body was soaked in mud! We also have some picnics there.

After 10 minutes, nasa farm na kami. Dati palay at pakwan lang tinatanim namin alternately. But last 2 years, naisipan ng tatay ko na magtanim ng ibang variety like kamatis, sitaw at saging. Pero this year mas naging oks when we planted papaya. Yep! It’s been 8 months na rin since we started papaya business. Click naman sya. Pero what I really enjoyed today is to be away from everything. Wala masyado iniisip. I Took a nap under a tree. I even brought a book with me. Good thing the weather today is ok, warm pero breezy. Hay… sarap talaga!

But we have to cut that trip short. Medyo madilim na rin kasi, and we have to visit another lola. Mas nagenjoy ako sa mga cousins ko on my dad’s side when we visited them. Simple, no pretentions, no fakers, and when I see them alam ko na mageenjoy ako.

After today's tour, I took a warm shower. I stayed longer in the there (wala ko ginawa ha!lol) and had my reflection. Why I kept comparing my relatives on both sides. Why things bother me, why i kept thinking of her. I had a reflection of my week, My-so-unproductive week. And after a day of clearing my thoughts, sadly I ended up filling it up again.

Verdict

One of the most difficult task a doctor must do is when he will declare a prognosis or a diagnosis to a patient, especially when the findings are terminal or in a chronic state. But the most difficult of all is when the patient is your relative; much worst… you’re immediate family.

So far, one thing I learned here in school is to be… a toughie. Your professors will show dissatisfaction on your work, criticizing every bits and turns that you do and your mentors will mock you. I know it’s a part of the training, to become a five star physician. But in terms with your family, how can you not show a bit of emotion? How can you say an outcome without making you feel that you’re not giving a verdict to a person you grew up with?

A very good example is Dr. Cristina Yang of Grey’s Anatomy. (I’m not really a fan but I watched some episodes) I remember she ruthlessly delivered to a family that the corpse of a man will be used as an organ donor. She mentioned every single organ in front of the wife and the 5 year old daughter like, how about the heart… the liver… kidneys… the skin… Astonishingly, she delivered that.

I was told that in those instances, I have to treat my family as my patient. And when that time comes, I know that I have to be the strong one. That I have to exude some hope and strength, because I know, that it will be the only thing my family will hold on to. As of now, I have to train myself...

Happy New Year!

I haven’t had any serious post lately. My mind was so preoccupied with post Christmas stuffs, such as thinking of how can I maximize my vacation, loads of pending notes to review, the delayed yet soon to come Exchange gift with my cousins, more notes to review, cleaning my room here in Cavite and more notes!=)

The hell with me! 3 more days to go and its 2008. I need to change few things from my routine or maybe change my whole routine. As a reflection of my 2007, I can’t actually say that it was full of mishaps for me. 2007 is not really my year but I still recognize all the things that happened as a blessing for enlightening me and making me grow as a person. This year was an eye-opener to me that I still lack something and must hone responsibility. For the past year I thought I was mature enough, living by myself and making decisions for myself. But this year’s events made me comprehend that I lack the capability of moving on instantly and cares so much to someone’s criticism that it sank me deeper to my misery. It didn’t help...

But first, I have to thank God for giving me and my family a healthy year. I have to thank Him as well for giving me new friends here in the blogging world.=]

Also this year, exactly last April, my sister went to NY to work and it’s not very easy for us that she’s far and I know she feels the same. I know we’re kind of overreacting to this but I haven’t said this, but I really care so much to my one and only ate. Before, I confronted his first-and-still boyfriend that “subukan mo lang lokohin ate ko, wag k ng magbalak tumapak ng Cavite”. It’s the first Christmas that we’re incomplete. First year those birthdays were celebrated and she’s not here. I have to say that I’m really proud of her for being so strong and being a toughie in facing her future.

Maybe I didn’t do great things this year but I realize that most of my family members were successful and happy with their lives. To my mom and dad enjoying their retirement; My eldest brother having his engagement, a great soon-to-be ate and a new car; To my 2nd eldest brother on promotion and has a really happy healthy and a slimmer look; My Lola Ching’s 90th bday which is celebrated last 25th and to my cousin’s news that she’s having her first baby. I can say all the ugly things that came to pass were erased by all this good things that happened to my love ones.

As for me, I have to make specific changes like saving money and not spending a lot, not being so much self-absorbed, and I have to lessen my swearing. In general I have to continue and deepen my studying. As I always pray and ask God to give me a clear mind and enough concentration.

As for my friends, I’m praying that we all have a prosperous New Year. I'm celebrating with you all! Cheers=)